Jumping off the Ladder of Anxiety
In this post I will explore the mental strategies I use to deal with anxiety. Anxiety can be a complex issue so while I may distil this in to a simple set of steps, the application of this to alleviate deep seeded anxiety both for me and others will take determination and perseverance.
Let’s start of by establishing some definitions (at least how I see it anyway!).
The Ladder
Concern happens in the present moment. If you are concerned about something you pay attention to it. Concerns often relate to our own ability to handle the situation in front of us.
Worry is like a projected version of concern where our mind is occupied with the potential negative implications of events which may happen in the future.
Stress (which can be either healthy or detrimental, but detrimental in this context) is what manifests when concern or worry trigger a physiological change in us. There is significant research on the negative impact of too much, or the wrong type stress on health.
When stress is endured for a long time, it can be accepted as the new “normal” and often unconsciously suppressed in our mind in an act of self-preservation. This is what we would call chronic stress.
Anxiety is a bit like nonspecific stress focused on future events. If we have unconscious concerns, these give rise to stress which is difficult to pin back to a root cause.
Chronic anxiety is where we accept this as our base level of functioning; habitual anxiety. If our unconscious concerns go unaddressed for long enough, the chain reaction of psychology they underpin becomes entrenched in our way of being to the extent that we accept this as who we are and a symptom of simply being alive.
The Smoke Alarm
Smoke alarms can be rather annoying!
How often does your smoke alarm go off when you simply burn the toast?
The only reason that humans accept the over cautious deafening shrill is because this is how are minds are built to work.
Back from the times when we ran the risk of being eaten when we stepped out of our cave, humans developed elements of the egoic mind to predict future life-threatening scenarios so we could be proactive to prevent events unfolding. Super helpful to stop you getting eaten.
In todays society (well in humanised parts of the world), the chances of getting eaten are much, much smaller. We also have more comfortable lives than ever before meaning we don’t need to worry about food or shelter.
The systems of our mind know this, but are still active, so instead they need to find other subject matter to ruminate on and keep us safe.
A side effect of this is the disproportionate elevation in the significance of things outside of our control – these systems know only to handle every thing as a death threat and label them so. This unconscious shift in perception can then influence the way we consciously perceive the world.
Learning to Use our Senses
Developing an awareness of concern, worry, stress, and anxiety is the first step. We need to understand what each of these mean to us, and develop an awareness of when we are experiencing them. Once we are aware of the experience, we can then work both to identify the root cause while also deploying strategies to directly address these feelings.
Here are some strategies that I use:
- When concerns arise, evaluate what we can and cannot control.
- Accept what we cannot control as simply “what is”.
- Plan action for what we can change.
When worry arises refer to our plans and what we need to accept – this is about re-grounding yourself in object reality. The aim here is to short circuit anxiety before it even arises.
Anxiety is More of the Same
If I feel anxious, well, it is not always that simple…
Anxiety can be a masking emotion that misdirects our attention on to some future event, but is actually highlighting a shortcoming in our self-belief and self-worth – our evaluation of our ability to deal with life.
A few steps may be required to join the dots between the event in front of us and the underlying limiting self-beliefs that we hold.
In this scenario, we need to keep asking yourself why and practicing honesty.
The process of acceptance and action planning is the same, but several iterations will be required before we evidence to ourselves that we have the ability to deal with what life is presenting us with.
So Simple?
I have simmered this down in to a set of simple steps that I personally use. The practical reality of applying these steps for every individual will be different, and while simple, this is not simplistic.
There are skills needed for all the steps which I have not gone in to detail with. Things such as:
- Learning how to evaluate what we can and cannot control
- Coming to terms with the feeling of accepting what we cannot control
- Understanding how to create effective and realistic plans for action
The key to all of this though is first accepting that we are responsible for our own mental health. Fundamentally this is something all neurologically sound humans have the power to take control of.
We cannot change the life we were born in to, and all of our journeys will be different. I will leave you with this quote to ponder:
If you were born poor, it is not your mistake.
If you die poor, it is your mistake.
– Bill Gates
Enjoy, for now.