Solitude and Self-Honesty

I have found that as I have got older I have developed a deeper awareness of the choices that are available to me. This awareness is not about finding new choices to make, it is about accepting responsibility for what I can control and accepting what I cannot.

But how did this awareness emerge?

Maybe it is because I have accumulated life experience and through all the ups and downs, I have acquired a new expanded perspective. Maybe it is because as I have got older, I have started to spend increasing amounts of time by myself.

Maybe it is a bit of both.

One thing I do know is that you cannot hide from the man in the mirror.

Solitude

As society we are conditioned to want the company of other humans; conditioned to want the ego strokes of other individuals acknowledging our existence. This is both a cultural phenomenon as well as being a facet of the pure nature of humans as a social animal.

If you want to do something like go for a walk or go to the cinema; there is a little voice that says that we should do that with some else.

Granted, doing things with some company can often make then “fun”, but what you will experience is a diluted version of the present moment where your attention is divided between the other human and the experience unfolding right in front of you.

Developing strong relationships with other humans is essential to living a fulfilling life. You cannot give what you have not got though so that means your most important relationship is the one that you have with yourself.

Self-Honesty

When we spend time in solitude. It is just I and me. Alone.

This means that the only person that needs to accept our excuses and procrastinations is our self.

Yes, it is completely possible to lie to ourselves. I know this from my own experience. The honest reality is though, that when we lie to ourselves, we know that it is a lie. A self-delusion brought about to try and keep us “safe”.

How do you know it is a lie?

Are you afraid to ask yourself a question about your belief, afraid to challenge it, afraid to lift the carpet and see what has been swept under?

Fear is a clear sign you are not being truthful.

You see, when we are truthful with ourselves the feeling is one of light weighted relief. The weight comes off our shoulders and the bricks which were casting a shadow over us are now gone; we can finally receive the light of the universe.

A light and energy which lifts our soul and restores our vitality.